I Used to be Afraid

No Longer Afraid

I used to be so afraid. Afraid of change.  Afraid of failing.  Afraid of what people think of me.  Afraid of not being good enough.  Afraid of not fitting in.  Afraid of standing out.  Afraid of death. Just afraid.

used to…Oh, sweet past tense!

I am no longer so afraid.  I am no longer a slave to fear.  I choose to not let fear control my life anymore.

My life has changed drastically in the past 5 years, and I am taking steps to purposely change it over the next 5 years.  I am tired of living afraid.  Life is going to change whether I move or sit still.  So I might as well bravely make the moves myself towards the me I want to be, instead of letting this world decide who I am.  Bye-bye fear of change!

I am going to fail sometimes. Accepting that saves me from worrying. I used to spend too much time worrying about whether or not something was going to work out. I used to get upset when I tried something new and it didn’t work out.  I thought it was a waste of my time.  I would never know if could do it though if I had not tried. Failure is bound to happen. Sometimes we have to find out what doesn’t work in order to find what does. Bye-bye fear of failing!

What people think of me really isn’t any of my business. I have come to learn that no matter how much I try, I can’t change what some people think of me. I’m learning to accept that it really doesn’t matter what others think of me anyway. What matters is what God thinks of me. If I am living for Him, then I am doing what I need to do regardless of what others think about my life. Bye-bye fear of what others think!

All I can do is what I can do, and what I can do is enough.” I’m not sure where that quote originated, but it has become a good mantra for me. I used to strive for perfection – in school, in marriage, at work. I was afraid of not being good enough for my parents, for my husband, and for my job. That fear only hurt me. So now I am accepting that my best is good enough. I am good enough. Bye-bye fear of not being good enough!

I used to think I needed to fit in. I needed my hair to be straighter. I needed to wear name-brand clothes. I was afraid that my curly hair, my department store clothes, and my braces made me stand out. We’re supposed to outgrow this need to fit in after high school, right? I thought so. Then I grew up and found myself still trying to fit in—at work, at church, at the gym. Good grief! It’s exhausting trying to fit in. I’m becoming more and more comfortable with who I am as I’m working on being the best me now. Bye-bye fear of not fitting in and fear of standing out!

I am no longer afraid of dying. I am a Christian. If I’m living for God, then death means something better than this life on Earth. I’m learning to appreciate the short time I have here, and use it more purposefully. Bye-bye fear of death!

Afraid Girl – No more!

Brave Girl – Arise!

XOXO

-Ash

 

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Author: Ashley

Midwest girl. Enjoying life with my husband.

One thought on “I Used to be Afraid”

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